For many years I used substances to fill a void in myself that I did not want to face. I carried a sense of pain and sadness that I believed only substances could fix. Every time I attempted to find recovery, the mental obsession of using again would overcome me, ultimately leading to the next relapse. I had ruined all the relationships in my life. I knew if I continued to use, I was going to die. During my final relapse, an overpowering sense of gloom and darkness took over me.
Every single door that once was open was now closed and I was left alone, in a filthy motel room, with two choices-live or die. That is when I asked God to help me. The moment I asked God to help me, the darkness that overpowered me for so many years, was softened and I was filled with light and hope. For the first time, I chose to walk with God. Hitting rock bottom allowed me to fully surrender. I found hope in my surrender.
I walked through that door with God and I have not looked back. Today, I no longer obsess about my next fix or putting any substances into my body. I get to experience life beyond my wildest dreams. Recovery has shown me how to live freely and joyfully. I am forever grateful for the journey I have experienced because it has given me the strength and courage to walk through any door. I know I can survive because I am a survivor!
An addict’s story of COURAGE as told by Samantha
Knowing I was going to have to stop using was very scary. All the bridges had been burnt; the only options left were prison or death.
My circle closed in. I knew I had to stop. The life I had known was coming to an end and I didn’t want to die but I told everyone I did because I wanted pity. I wanted my own way. I was so scared.
Eventually the doors that were once open, had CLOSED. I was alone and I realized that there was NO way out except to surrender, get sober and deal with the consequences of the wreckage of my past. Then one more door opened. It was the door that brought me out of the darkness.
I now see the light on the other side of the door. I am relieved. I want to live. I want more for myself. It is at this point that I know nothing can stop me. I had hit rock bottom and was ready. I have the motivation to walk through that door from darkness to light.
More Stories from OpenDoor
OpenDoor is seeking ordinary people to do extraordinary things and form a community of support
for women who are recovering from addiction.
We are in search of volunteers who are willing share their own valuable and unique life experiences
within a small group setting to help affect real change.
Hope • Help • Healing
OpenDoor is a licensed user of the Open Table model which has been utilized for 18 years across the country.
For more information about the model of change being implemented, see Open Table National Overview Information.
PROSPECTIVE VOLUNTEER INFORMATIONAL MEETINGS (VIRTUAL)
WHEN: FIRST TUESDAY MONTHLY AT 7PM
Informational meetings are held virtually on Zoom every first Tuesday of the month beginning at 7pm.
Informational meetings provide a forum for inquiring and prospective volunteers to learn more about OpenDoor Women's Recovery Alliance and the various opportunities to volunteer.
Email Tammy with any questions and to receive the link to join the Zoom meeting.